Monday, November 07, 2005

That New Car Smell!

Sitting in traffic the other day brought to mind one of my biggest pet peeves: super-giganto SUVs -- namely Hummers.

I loathe them and their drivers. There's just something about the whole "fuck you" attitude coming off the typical Hummer driver that infuriates me. I can just tell that they're driven by trophy wives or the guys who married the trophy wives who are now screwing their secretaries in between 3-martini lunches and hair plug surgery.

The only thing that I remotely enjoy about these fiberglass behemoths is their name. Hummer. I get the Beavis and Butthead giggles every time I hear it. Personally, I think more automobiles ought to be named after sexual activities. In fact, I nominate myself to head the next concept-car marketing team...

"Introducing the brand new, fully-customizable... Ford Fellatio!
Come, take it for a test drive and feel the power of the Fellatio's 2 strapping engines as they crank out 300 hp! Plus, you can customize your ride with any number of strap-ons (oops!) add-ons!"


Blogger Hannah Gerber said...

OOH, thats funny!

3:54 PM  

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